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Posts Tagged ‘Crush’

Well it appears that my crush is no longer afraid of me, I’m hoping that. Noticed she was wearing makeup and this past week after seeing her I’ve been feeling a sense of euphoria.

Does this mean she likes me? At this point it I really hope so because it’s going to be impossible for me to try asking her to lunch again.. for fear she might do the same thing again. So I’m going to take it easy. If she really wants to do lunch, I really hope she finds a way.

Otherwise anytime i see her I’ll try to find out her name and that way anytime i see her I’ll call her by name then. Its looking good now and hope she understands that I want to take things slowly. I dont want to scare her off again. So I’m going to try to coax her that maybe she can hint she wants lunch with me.

Until then I hope it all works out. Definitely need prayers on this. Got to figure out what she wants me to do that I feel comfortable with.

Edit: On the note about basically asking her to lunch is near impossible, its doubtful she’ll try (unless shes really that interested enough to do something) or shes seeing/has someone else already. In any case, I’ll be friendly to her and work towards being work friends and maybe she’ll reveal her interest if she is interested. Although its hard to get to know someone when its 30 seconds of passing by and that’s if it’s a regular thing.

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First of all, the cost of living is ridiculous. To make it worse the wonderful state of Illinois doubled the gas tax and car registration is now another $50. I’m already straining on buying a new car even a relatively new Honda Accord costs around $25k. That’s $25,000. Needless to say I gotta wonder if I could get a Dodge Challenger.

I love Chicago and Illinois for its wonderful weather and sights. However the politicians are a huge problem. They can’t find ways to cut expenses yet we the taxpayers are funding their huge homes and $70k vehicles. They make over $50k a year which is ridiculous when we have to pay taxes that won’t even fix the bad roads. Instead they tear up perfectly good roads and ignore the ones with crater sized potholes.

Even though gas taxes are not too terrible, you got a ton of people driving way over the speed limit which also uses more gas up. They dont seem to mind though because they’re getting upset with me for driving 55mph instead of 60mph and they dont always like me driving 60 either.

It’s gotten ridiculous with the costs and taxes.

On to the other topic so I did freak out a bit when I saw my favorite crush drive up (I could see it with the door ajar and even though the window) I was already getting ready to leave to go to the other plant but it just seems that I’m not ready to see her quite yet.

Also for Friday and Monday during her 12:30pm lunch I got this vibe of feeling anxious or anxiety. Like I wonder if she was worried I might try to talk to her again or something. I really don’t know what’s going on there… I keep rationalizing it, that’s it’s just all in my head but also I was a bit rattled when I saw her drive up. I’m not sure whether she came by my workstation because I was facing the other way letting a coworker/friend know I have done the first pass with some parts. I also kept far away when I was heading to the other plant. The only thing I can think of at the moment is maybe she’s wondering why I’m not there when she is so maybe shes worried that I’m avoiding her. Like she might feel bad for canceling the lunch.

But see I don’t know and as far as what I’m doing, I’m moving on. So maybe being in the vicinity is doing something rather than avoiding the plant entirely. So it appears to be doing something, I hope. We’ll see what happens over the week.

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My problem with women. I should stop trying to ask them out. It’s clear I’m not ready for that and should focus on being friends with them, especially if there is a spark, I’m just too frightened by crushes.

The problem is, I’m not ready. People want to rush me into relationships. They want to play cupid and that simply wont work. Even if I feel there is a connection with someone I’m not going to rush into it. Not at all. It’ll simply be a brief conversation and only once in awhile. I just will not push it and I will use my timidness toward women I like.

I need to stop listening to advice because it’s no good. I’m nowhere near that level of confidence yet and I got to just stick to what I am comfortable with.

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Well I managed to talk to this woman I like at work today, it all went well.. I even asked her if she wanted lunch. She wasn’t sure but then ended up saying yes.

Unfortunately I hit a snag. She either bailed or had a very important phone call. I may have pushed it a little too much by asking her to lunch. At first I thought it was, welp shes not really interested.

However I think it’s more likely I scared her away. Because she seemed like she was interested.. but perhaps shes very timid. I tend to be that way too..

Clearly thinking about this for a minute she may just need additional coaxing. Which works on my level because I myself am that way. I was kind of hoping that maybe we could have alleviated that by getting to know one another. So basically I’m going to have to change my process.

I hope I didn’t damage this too much but well, I’ll let her approach me now. If she seems too distant then maybe shes really not interested. Well next time I’ll just smile and wave at her. Or.. something. But I do get the impression she might be interested.. just very timid.

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