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You may have heard of “live and let live” surrounding the LGBT community. Many would consider this as who cares what people do in their own homes. However this mentality has driven the LGBT organization to new heights and now they are shoving their lifestyle in everyone’s faces.

In schools, on the street, businesses.. now in the media such as the news and movies such as Toy Story 4 as a subliminal message. If that’s not enough…

Moms expose library’s shocking ‘Youth Pride’ event: homosexuality, transgenderism, drag queens

I couldn’t imagine how this managed to escalate to this point other than maybe, just maybe these people should have never left the mental asylums. Make no mistake about this, no matter what professionals say, the LGBT are mentally ill. Particularly the ones pushing this agenda to the extreme. Recruiting people by singing ridiculous songs about how people should do what they feel.

“If you feel like a girl, then you are one”

This is clearly showing kids and adults that it’s ok to change your sex or gender. Since transgenderism hasn’t really been in the Bible very much it stands to be clear it wasn’t a very big problem. Being gay however that was a big problem as often it was seen as an abomination and homosexuals were stoned when caught being with someone of the same sex.

So where did transgenderism start? It wasnt very easy to get sex reassignment surgery and even making a male look like a woman it wasnt easy. Maybe perhaps most people shunned away from this behavior or its possible it wasn’t an issue. So 4 or 5 out of 2,000 people thought they were the wrong gender. To avoid being outcasts they accepted the sex they were assigned to at birth.

Pretty much this was never an issue up until professionals got it into their heads about sex reassignment surgeries. Trying to surgically alter a male to look like a female despite the fact they’re still a male. Now if we were talking about intersex people, those born as two sexes which is incredibly rare they shouldn’t be considered transgender but intersex. They could be an intersex woman or man depending on the dominant sex. Again this is incredibly rare and unlikely to pose a problem if we considered reality instead of feelings.

If a male feels like he’s a woman or female that’s just a mental problem because, when was the last time you declared yourself as a male or female? I never thought about it. I figure, I’m a man based on the fact I’m male. I was taught this through biology and other teaching.

I never once thought I was a woman or a female. This .08% minority who has been recruiting people to be gay or transgender is inflating their numbers and I can see why it’s so high now. The extreme push for LGBT can only be accomplished through numbers and these people are everywhere now. In business, media and even in church. We’re on the losing side here because the LGBT has been a corrupt entity. Somehow the rights of being gay or transgender has slipped right by us when they closed the doors of many mental asylums. When the funds ran dry some people decided that being gay or transgender isn’t a threat to society.

Ok again, didn’t see people being gay is a threat but who in their right minds thought that males being women was a great idea? I dont care if it was the best idea at the time, transgenders shouldn’t have been allowed to be set free either. Being transgender means being rejected by a lot of potential relationships and they’ve made a big deal out of this.

“If you don’t date a transgender person you’re transphobic, shallow bigoted person who doesn’t deserve anyone”

More mind control, guilt trip scare tactics by the transgender recruitment team. Some transgenders dont think this way yet it’s almost unnoticeable that they’re really a male. Oh then you have those..

“Females do have a penis! You just see women as sexual objects. Wanting a vagina over a penis. Go away you stupid shallow bigot!”

Like is this an effin joke to these people?  I feel like this is an intervention where if you don’t date a black woman your a racist against blacks or if you dont like “plus size” women you’re shallow. Is it really that difficult that people are attracted to some people and not others?

Being gay is something that should be kept in family, behind closed doors.. if that’s even permitted…

Being transgender, there needs to be a better way than allowing men to be women and women to be men. Conversation therapy is becoming an illegal practice and already a few legit ones were forced to be abandoned because it’s not part of the LGBT agenda where..

“If you are gay, then be gay. If you want to be a female, then s*** f*** you are a female.”

The LGBT organization is relentless and what they are doing is evil. They need numbers and they’re pushing kids to be transgender or gay. We “live and let live” and this is what we got. The real sad part is these people will either try to deny this or they’ll say “you’re a transphobic, homophobic bigot dinosaur that needs to die off.”

Yes they’ve said that to some people on social media. The things they say shows that they’ll do anything it takes to make the world accept and love gay and transgender. Even though no matter what there will always be those who will not. They know this and when they get enough numbers and too many many rights, people including me who is speaking the truth will be jailed for life without parole or access to the outside world. They may as well put us folks in Gitmo if they had their way.

The LGBT must be stopped.

 

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Even though she bailed, I sort of moved on (not really but..) I have to seek forgiveness. I realised why she bailed for two reasons. One well, being that I moved on her too quickly by asking her to meet with me during lunch. It may have scared her (and it may be possible that she does really like me but is really timid, but I’m not going to assume that yet). The other reason.. well it might be possible that I made tbe mistake with a past woman who thought I was interested in her. Early on a co worker at a retail store asked me if I liked this cashier. I thought she was attractive but it wasn’t meant that I was interested.

Well that escalated quickly into her thinking that I was interested and I asked her if we could talk during break. We managed to work that out and we had a good conversation but afterwards I ignored her.. mainly because I wasn’t really into her. She was great to talk with but early on I found out she was vegan and her Myspace (the early Myspace days) and onother blog where she broke up with her boyfriend because he didn’t share her enthusiasm with being a Christian (she left for a year to go to some Christian bible camp) and later started going on a lot about Jesus and God.

I believed in that stuff, my dad was a hardcore Christian like her.. but I’m not huge into it like I don’t share the same infinity to go to church, take a bible study group and strictly keeping friends who are the same.

I don’t hang around bad crowds, get drunk or do drugs. I dont sleep with women, I’d rather save for a special woman. Heck I won’t even tear off those mattress labels.

I fail at being a good person all the time but I try. It gets tough when someone or something makes me angry though. My father had a lot of anger issues which led me to be disinterested in Christianity. There was others who were uptight about everything and i didn’t want to end up that way. After working with many Mexicans I noticed I like how they react to different situations, a few of them get pissy every so often but there is a ton of positivity and good energy (minus some of them trying to hook me up with a woman). I’ve also started watching the early seasons of Hawaii Five-O reboot. Besides having a ton of great action I like the interaction between Steve and Danny. Many of it is hilarious, but the whole team cares about one another (like they do in NCIS and MacGyver, both versions) and I like that. My current job co workers do the same, its like I told one of my bosses that my brake lines rusted out, causing brake loss and had to use the handbrake she was like, I need a new car.. but for now I gotta work with it but she wanted me to be safe. It shows that they dont just want to be a boss, they also want you to be safe and what not.

I had too much negativity in my life which isnt good. There still is but I’m dredging through it.

Back to this woman (the one from the Myspace days) I liked her, but for 2 reasons I just couldn’t proceed through it. Her being a vegan, it scared me off because I dont know how to handle it. We talked a bit but it felt a little forced…

Fast forward to my current crush, I wonder if maybe she thinks I would stop talking to her because in the beginning I did avoid/ignore her nor I really smiled when we crossed paths. I was caught up in work and wasn’t thinking about women (I had sort of given up at that time as well after Kaitlyn). Realizing a co worker trying to set me up with another woman who ended up in my field of vision, I just wasn’t interested. Seeing how I was interested in someone else (that I just feel I have a connection with) I wanted to focus on that but really just didn’t know how to and while I still don’t I know I have to seek forgiveness with her and hopefully be able to focus on trying to forma. friendship with her. If later on we start seeing each other and end up being a couple. I’m completely all for it. I would really like that and while it’s sort of on the table, I really do hope there is potential for that.

If not, and I have to accept that willingly (because I screwed up with Kaitlyn) and at least be great friends. It’ll be difficult, especially if she already thinks I’m interested in her and want a relationship but one of the things is. I won’t do anything until both of us are ready. If she doesn’t want a relationship with me, that’s fine. I just dont want her to feel like she has to avoid me because I’m attracted to her. I don’t want to do the same because I think she isn’t interested or because I’m too scared to find out.

Really all I want is to feel comfortable around her and for her to feel the same and we can get to know one another better. I felt a ton of anxiety being around the same plant as her and even during moments of just working. And I am scared to do this but I’ll just be there and see if she passes by and start off small and slow. I wont ask her to meet for lunch or do any approaching other than maybe a brief conversation. I will just wait for us to bump into one another. I dont want any more mistakes and I really need a ton of prayers with this. Hopefully I wont feel too anxious or scared and breaking the ice for first encounter hopefully on Monday or whenever I’ll just smile and say hi that it’ll progress. A lot of prayers for many other things is needed but for one, there has to be a reason why she appeared to try to get my attention. I want to find out what that was. Maybe she does like me but gave up. Or maybe she thinks I like someone else. Who knows what else. This is a struggle but when she bailed on the lunch meet, I felt hurt by it. And I forgive her. Hopefully she can do the same, especially since it’s been three weeks since we ran into one another. So we’ll see what happens and I hope it all works out.

I feel bi polar with this and its because I’m interested in her but I’ve been hurt too many times so I’m going back and forth with this and there’s just a battle going on. Need prayers with this as well.

Also my dad is Lutheran not Catholic. I’m not really sure of the difference but most people I know are Catholic.

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From the crime show, NCIS. Gibbs has a rule to never date a co-worker.

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Anyway, this blog is a personal one (no EVs this time). My previous job I happened to like a girl who turned up didn’t like me back. I said some things to her online that I shouldn’t have and being at work has made things incredibly awkward. Not to mention work itself had gotten worse and I wasn’t getting enough hours (well other employees didnt get enough it was difficult times). I didn’t even want to be there because work had gotten too stressful. I felt like I didn’t belong there.

While this was happening I really got into watching NCIS and Rule #12 came up. Never date a co-worker. Sound advice and for those wondering what the other ones are…

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Some are missing, not mentioned or it’s an outdated photo im not sure which because I never kept up on every rule made. Some of them are good actually. So with my new job I kept the same mindset, Rule #12. It’s been working up until recently other co-workers have been trying to get me in a relationship with someone, no one in particular just generally asking me why I haven’t got a woman, wife or kids.

They also couldn’t have asked ata worse time. I have been focused on saving a new car (new 0-3 years, not an older vehicle) and I really want to get a Dodge Challenger, even if it’s a V6 version. But even with a bit of overtime it’s going to take some time to do. I can’t really afford to date right now and I really have no plans of a relationship.

Kids and possibly marriage is out of the question as they’re not cheap. Another thing is im not a romantic, sorry ladies. I feel like buying stuff like a card, flowers and chocolate, having candlelight dinners and long walks on beaches are a bit, outdated and cheesy. Going out to dinner at a greasy hamburger joint and seeing an action movie are my ideas of dating.

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All jokes aside many women are looking for a romance, something im probably capable of but not something I’d like to do and I’ve already made my peace with being single. Bottom line is that relationships are too much guesswork. Sometimes you don’t really know what the other person really wants and I’m not even sure I want a relationship.

Now that I got that out of the way there is a woman i work with, not really though considering the fact we’re on opposite sides of a small plant with a wall as a barrier, but there are times where she is on side I’m on. Mostly I haven’t really thought much of it but I work around one of the many access points to the plant I’m in so a few times she had mentioned, “good morning” before I had lost overtime hours and she started before me. So eh whatever, time goes by and just this last several weeks I caught her looking at me which at first I brushed it off but the most recent 2 was on Thursday. It was almost like she was looking at me like “why won’t you talk to me” but it could also be 200 other things.

The most obvious sign would be is the gossiping of me still being single from the guys. I almost wished I had said, yes I do have a gf so they could leave me alone, but they’ll be asking for photos. And you know, every smartphone has a camera so even if I had to take a photo of my imaginary gf sleeping, that just wouldn’t get them to stop asking for one.

I found a great job with a bunch of employees who are nosy.

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Oh well. Anyway since Thursday I just put up my blinders and focused on the job. All I can do is smile and move on. Not that this female co-worker isn’t attractive but well, I don’t really approach people i don’t know, unless it’s something I need I usually let others approach me. Makes it hard to make friends but as an introvert, it doesn’t really matter. I’m 39 years old and have never been on a date or relationship so at this point, in just used to the idea of being single that the idea of relationships just doesn’t interest me as much as it used to.

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I am that sort of person who does not like dealing with unnecessary stress. In fact i can’t deal with stress period. And already i am dealing with stress on the day to day basis. https://www.stress.org/stress-effects/ 

Already i have some of the symptoms of stress one of them is that i am too tired to deal with daily activities. While i don’t think i am dealing with depression i do sleep often which is related to stress. Now i am struggling with basic tasks like organizing or being able to do activities. I have had this problem for quite awhile so it may be possible that some of my stress symptoms are due to bad habits from being stressed.

However this past month and especially past week i got hit hard with some stressors. It is mostly buying a new home which is actually exciting but also stressful at the same time. Attempting to get the home buying process over and done with isn’t going quick enough, which is fine, because my bank is loaning quite a bit of money and there is stuff in between that has to be dealt with. The very fact that this process is stressful, i rely on other things in life to take it easy on me. However that is remained to be seen.

My father has the tendency to stress me out with 100 annoying questions that i wouldn’t dare to ask let alone, if you think there is no such thing as a stupid question.. let me introduce you to my father. Someone who constantly asks dumb questions such as what are you doing at work today (because i work with him) when he is the one that gives me the jobs, not myself. So now i gotta worry about this on the daily basis. But that wasn’t enough, i now all of a sudden have to take MORE RESPONSIBILITY at work by going to a class for a couple of hours a day. Ridiculous. I didn’t have to take this class, there is nothing to be gained by taking this class and it’s just unnecessary headaches and stress. Now again, i am the type of person who avoids stress and conflict so i am now having a bad time. The reason i left my other job was because of too much stress. I just bought a new home so that’s basically sealing the deal that i require this job or something within the pay capacity of my current job.

I really do regret taking on this job to working with my father and also regretting buying a new home but i had to do this for my cat and myself. I can’t be spending work nights at my parents and sleeping in my parents basement because that’s just going backwards. I want to move forward and live on my own. With my newfound job stress and having to deal with more responsibilities i am now open to finding a roommate (thankfully i bought 2 bedrooms) or rather kinda forced to be open but at the very least i am the manager of the place so if the tenant doesn’t follow certain guidelines i can boot them out. Obviously i will give them some time to relocate, unless of course they are not paying their share of the bills or causing problems for me to the point where they need to be gone immediately. I’d probably search for people at churches as they would be more responsible then someone i’d find off the street or hear of someone in need of a place.

But, i didn’t get my new home just for kicks. I really thought about it and needed it, for my cat since i live further away from work from where i am now going to work. It won’t cost me $12 in gas, more like $5-7 on a daily basis. Anyway i also got it because it has a garage and currently my car is being used as a garage. An extra tire in the trunk, tools, car fluids. Basically i fix my own car with the stuff i need inside the car because living in my apartment 7 stories in the air is too far to keep the stuff inside my apartment. Plus i would forget things like oil and power steering fluid when i need it the most, it’s just easier and more effective to leave it in the car. With a garage though, i can do all the stuff right from there if i need to.

But at this point in time i can’t really deal with a whole lot and getting older, there are things i am just not worrying about and could care less about. I don’t really care about having a relationship with someone i don’t even want kids. And speaking of that it’s pretty selfish to say that someone that doesn’t want kids but will have a pet are mentally ill.

 Having Pets Instead Of Kids Should Be Considered A Psychiatric Disorder
We couldn’t afford to have kids

The absurdity of other people telling people like me that wanting pets over children is a mental illness and who cares if you can’t afford kids, God will provide. Which may be true to an extent. You will end up having to deal with money problems, wondering if next weeks paycheck will keep the food on the table and the roof over your families heads. There are some things that i have done that i wished i hadn’t. Spending my weekly paychecks on new cds and dvds every time i got paid i would go and buy some new cds or even a videogame or two. But at that time i was financially care free. Now i question every purchase i make and if i can’t come up with 5 good reasons why i need it i don’t buy it. If any reasons include, i need to live, i don’t need to come up with any other good reasons. And i like to think i’ve become a pro at managing my money fairly well but that’s only half the battle. It’s whether i can save that money, to put away and don’t touch until i need it for something like a car/home repair. Or perhaps buying a second vehicle, which i am looking at trucks which are not cheap these days. But a truck will be good for winter and they are built to move stuff.

Now, anyway back to kids, stress and anxiety. I automatically would have a major anxiety attack if i found out i have kids. Not that i do have any, but having kids is the biggest responsibility in the world today. Would my father say i could handle that, he would even though i absolutely cannot and would not. It is unnecessary stress, life itself is stressful. But we as humans decide what stressors we deal with. I am one that wants to limit the stress down to the bare minimum. I am that guy that would put the home thermostat at 50°F just to save money on the energy bill. Hey, that’s what we got long sleeve shirts for, just layer up and you’ll still be toasty warm. Maybe wear a hat and a scarf. It’s often used as a fashion statement nowadays. Why the need to spend money on something that you could keep warm with other means. They have these covers for windows to help keep the heat or cool air in. Windows are not very good insulators so there are other methods you can use, such as a blanket or it’s as easy as keeping the blinds closed during the summer and open during the winter times.

We’re not talking about energy savings though and i got a little carried away here but at any rate, sometimes i just want to scream at the sky asking God to stop giving me stressful situations because i don’t want it. I almost want to just take the money i do have and go live in the forest. All i’d have to worry about is getting food, shelter, heat, a way to keep cool and the rest of the time i’d be spending fishing or enjoying the great outdoors. Why does modern living have to include so much stress? Life is really too short to be stressed out all the time or even some of the time. It isn’t fun and stress is harmful to your body. And i believe i already hit anxiety levels which is when you are stressed to the max. I may have an anxiety disorder, i don’t know.. maybe perhaps i should see a doctor about that. According to this article,

If you identify with any of the following 7 signs and symptoms, and they just won’t go away, you may be suffering from an anxiety disorder:

Are you constantly tense, worried, or on edge?
Does your anxiety interfere with your work, school, or family responsibilities?
Are you plagued by fears that you know are irrational, but can’t shake?
Do you believe that something bad will happen if certain things aren’t done a certain way?
Do you avoid everyday situations or activities because they cause you anxiety?
Do you experience sudden, unexpected attacks of heart-pounding panic?
Do you feel like danger and catastrophe are around every corner?

Anxiety Disorders and Anxiety Attacks

I am only this way when i am stressed, i get tense, worried and on edge. I am plagued by fears and i often avoid situations or activities because they can cause anxiety. This mostly includes new things i am not familiar with. But again, these problems only occur if i am stressed out. If i get stressed out, anxiety soon follows and this week was a clear cut sign that i have been stressed to the point of anxiety levels. When i was driving home yesterday, i was venting my frustration and anger towards my father for signing up for things i am not comfortable handling. Soon after driving people were getting into a rush and this guy went around me when i moved to his lane. I was feeling road rage then. I wanted to tail this guy and honk at him but i did restrain myself from doing it but regardless i was still feeling the urge to road rage. It wasn’t just this guy but others and i had to try to calm myself down, i just wanted to get home.

I do see this as a clear cut sign that i just can’t handle dealing with stress. It’s better off that i don’t deal with it at all. I could have just spent $900+ a month on rent with money i will never see again or invest in a $1,200 a month home that i can get something out of it. Had i realized how difficult it was to obtain a home i probably would have just gotten an apartment. And that’s not even half the battle, i still have to do a home inspection and then be responsible for all the appliances there, if something goes wrong with one of them i may have to replace them if they can’t be repaired. However it turns out though, because it may be possible something will go awry and i won’t get the place, if that’s the case though i’ll be seriously disappointed because i already had gone through all this stress in order to get it and it was all for nothing but having to deal with apartment living longer. It could add or lessen the stress levels, but if i get the home i can get information on the year of all the appliances and go from there.

As i am typing this, it’s about 11am on Saturday, i was going to go grocery shopping to get a few things, but being stressed out i got lazy. I don’t think people realize what stress really does to me and i am thinking i may need help, thankfully if i get this new place there’s a church 20 minutes away with some help, hopefully with some prayers and what not that i can find some way of not being as stressed out or at the very least be able to convince my father than i cannot deal with these stresses that come up. I am also listening to some music so that is definitely calming me.

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